Mac and Cheese: On the cheap

I am a connoisseur of all things cheddar, the oranger the cheese, the happier the Sarah.
I prefer my cheese to have zero nutritional value and I like it to have at least 150 grams of fat. In fact, if the serving size on the bag is less than 1/4 cup, I guarantee that is a cheese I would eat.Something about the way melted orange cheddar gets that orange grease on it just makes me swoon. Why am I still sporting an inner tube around my midsection? Now you know. Now you know.

This Christmas my big brother's beautiful wife Rachel made a feast for our massive gang to enjoy. Any time Rachel cooks, find a way to invite yourself as I guarantee you will never eat better. My job was a side dish, easy right? I decided that a holiday where a whole pile of people would be eating together was a great time to get creative and challenge myself. I made a faboosh truffled mac and cheese.This mac and cheese was so special, it was made with aged white cheddar and Gruyere cheeses, truffle butter,garlic and shitake mushrooms. Divine. Every one liked it but I got a resounding chorus of "Gosh darn it send me the recipe, omit the mushrooms. Thanks." Well this was an eye opener. I had made a $40 mac and cheese and every one much preferred the regular old kind, cheddar, mac and done. Inneresting....

Something about that orange cheddar is magic, MAGIC I tell you.

Well I have since perfected my mac, sans shrooms and cut it down to a very budget happy, not at all healthy, $6 to make an entire 9X13 pan of home made mac. Oh, and read the bottom of the recipe for the best nuker version for leftovers.

Your shopping list:
4 cups of cheese- cheddar of the orange kind is the bulk of it, 3 cups or so, maybe toss in a cup of Monty jack or white cheddar too.
1 box of shells.( medium sized shells work GREAT as they hold the cheese in their pocket, like a cheesy kangaroo. Would you eat cheesy kangaroo? I would.)
1 & 1/4 cups milk. NOT SKIM.
A couple squirts of mustard- yellow of course.
Salt, pepper
1/2 stick butter

With out further ado:

Sarah's Mac and Orange Cheese casserole:

Heat oven to 400 degrees.
Boil pan of water- a big one.

1.Dump the pasta into the boiled, salty water
2. While those little babies are are cooking to al dente, grab a sauce pan and put in a 1/2 stick of butter, slowly melt it.
3. Once butter is melted add in a couple tea spoons of flour. Do not use the tsp. measuring spoon. Grab your regular old spoon from the drawer and shake a couple of tea spoons of flour in the butter. You are making a rue, this is a thickening agent for a sauce. Whisk this mess all together till it is blended and a pasty yellow color. Don't try to eat this, I know you will want to, it tastes like it looks, I have done it and just saved you a really weird experience. Although isn't learning I ate melted butter and flour a really weird experience for you?
4. To this mix of pasty rue ( my stripper name) a cup to a cup and a quarter of milk and whisk together till it is well blended. Let it start burbling on the stove, you'll need to turn the heat up a bit to achieve this. See if your sauce is starting to thicken, if it gets too thick, add a dash more milk. Do not use skim, you will regret it.
5. To the milky rue add in a couple squirts of yellow mustard, you can get fancy and try a Dijon or something but I promise, people much prefer things that taste like the color they are ( purple Popsicles and green jello any one?).
6. Whisk in the mustard and salt and pepper to taste.
7. Let burble till your noodle babies are done boiling. Whisk occasionally, cream sauces break really easily and separate if they stand too long or get skin on top. You don't want a broken, skinned sauce. It will make you sad.
8. If you haven't already done so, shred your cheese. You need 4 cups of orange cheddar. If you were smart you bought the already shredded kind. We call that the Sarah Special. Cause I am lazy, obviously. A tasty mix of cheese is 3 cups Orange and 1 cup white cheddar or Monty Jack. Or 5 cups of cheese if you are adventurous....And want to die young of cholesterol clots in your brain.I admit, sometimes I tempt fate and toss in 5 or so cups.
9. Drain your noodle babies and add in the sauce, stir it up add in the cheese, stir again.
10. Dump in a greased casserole, cake pan, whatever will hold that mess.
11. Bake for about 30-35 minutes. You want every thing melty and burbly.
12. Enjoy. Holy yum.

Nuker instructions in case you don't kill it the night before:

1.Grab your leftover mac, nuke it for about 1 minute.
2. Remove from nuker, sprinkle some more cheese on top to freshen it up. ( Any time I sneak away to "freshen up" at a party, you better believe I sneak away to eat cheddar.)
3. Nuke again for about 45 seconds.
4. When your mac is delicious and melty, put some awesome fresh tomato on top. I tell you, nothing will taste better coming out of a microwave than that. Wow.

My recipes are how I think them out in my head. If you need a more scientific explanation of any thing just let me know. I made this one up on my own and am darned proud of it. I hope you like it!